When the Heart Quietens

 

what we need is here.

And we pray,

not for new earth or heaven,

but to be

quiet in heart, and in eye, clear.

What we need is here.   ~  Wendell Berry

 

          Over and over, I hear them. The softest of bells silvering heaven’s word into the last days to Christmas.

What you need is here

Right here

          The long drive to bring our children home from college. Tree-lined roads curling and curving, like hands passing us safely from point to point. We arrived safely at the beautiful college and hours later, back home once more. I put my hands together in grateful thanks to a God who kept us safe to live another day on this earth. It meant so much to be safe and with family when the earth had just reclaimed 33 other lives at the base of a green valley, this past Friday.

What you need is here

What matters most to us

Often lie closest to us

          Crowded into our daughter’s campus room, we waited for our son to return from a site visit, to return home together. As my husband lay down a bit for some much needed rest, the others huddled together, giggling and laughing softly.

          And I sat at my girl’s neat desk to work on my studies.

          On the desk, a small figurine of Our Lady kept gentle watch over us all in that tiny room, spotless, neat yet cosy, filled with the heart of a child careful to care for all she has been given. A child who had come into this world, accompanied for a while, who then was left to make her beautiful way, from those early years to the now.

          Waiting to gather my thoughts, I ran my gaze over all that lay before me. Tenderly pinned into the felt board were pictures of our past, of children we will always love, who’ve taught us so much about God and life. Notes from a young girl to herself, careful to prepare for her days, unwilling to squander a single moment. Neatly arranged on the small desk were the many little things that told of her daily life away from us, each in its carefully assigned place.

          At its centre, serenely positioned, was Our Lady, after whom our precious one is named, quietly assuring me that our child is held close to Her maternal heart.

          A deep, deep peace flooded through me, stretching my heart to its edges. It was a fullness not often discerned, yet gently tucked in now.

What you need is here, right here

          Later, after a reunion with our son, all of us together, packed tight into a car too small yet enough. Back through those tree-lined boughs. Back to the old home where we had welcomed each one of our children as God sent them to us, one by one. 

          Through them all, as the old day creases in and the new one turns out, tiny bells come on the breath of rain~blessed winds. My heart stirs towards each chime.

          Christmas might be in a couple of days’ time.

          But it’s also already here.

That which matters the most       

Falls unseen by the wayside of the careless, busied gaze

But perceived

when love slows to savour and to thank.

For when the heart is quiet,

the eye is indeed clear.

 

 

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