After St Frances of Rome taught me that my new prayer was to be, God’s Will Be Mine, I had to be dragged to that prayer. The work of angels must have been particularly hard in those early hours of illumination.
With all the obedience of a mule, I forced my spirit to the prayer. Over and over, as often as the angel tinkled the prayer chime.
I took God’s Will Be Mine to the Rosary of Mary.
I took it to the Rosary of Atonement – the Divine Mercy Chaplet.
And I left it on my heart as I turned in for the night. God’s Will Be Mine.
Rousing from sleep to purple skies still watching for the sun’s call, I said the prayer once more.
And immediately knew a difference.
It came easily.
I put it down to the prayer becoming….. familiar, more than anything else.
Then, I went to the readings of the day, and the early lines of the 1st reading shone a white light straight into my heart:
Moses spoke to the people, saying:
“This day the LORD, your God,
commands you to observe these statutes and decrees.
Be careful, then,
to observe them with all your heart and with all your soul.
Today you are making this agreement with the LORD…” ~ Deuteronomy 26: 16 – 17
Today you are making this agreement with the LORD.
At those words, my soul felt like it had fallen before a great Light. A sudden rush of strength surged into me and I felt my whole being lifted. In a strangeness I can barely describe, I felt my sins fall away like scales at that kingly decree ~ Today you are making this agreement with the LORD.
I felt like I had been given another chance.
And with this, my spirit fell into a repentance I have never before experienced. Because it felt as if every barrier that had stood between me and grace before this, had been destroyed in a stroke.
My soul flung itself into the promise:
God’s statutes and decrees I will observe,
with all my heart and with all my soul.